Research Paper on:
Intimacy vs. Paradox, a Literary Comparison

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dependent on their parents for survival for at least a decade and partially dependent on them past that. Considering this extended period of dependency, it is, therefore, not surprising  that one of the principal tasks of adulthood is to "give up the parent as parent" and assume "more and more responsibility for oneself in the world" (Williamson 6).  This topic is the focus of attention in two books, The Intimacy Paradox by Donald S. Williamson (1991) and You Cant Grow up Till You Go Home Back Home by  William Nerin (1993). Both of these psychologist propose theories that address the difficulties and obstacles involved in the crucial developmental task of re-establishing the "ground rules" with ones parents wherein  the adult "child" perceives their equality as adults with their parents, while simultaneously seeing their parents as fully human. A young child sees parents as virtual "gods," all-knowing giants  who understand the complexity of the world. However, as Nerin points out, a crucial factor in achieving maturity is to be able to relate to ones parents as the  "human beings..., not on the basis of the roles" that they played in ones life (9). This allows an individual to actually "feel" like an adult. A common situation  in comedy is when capable, resourceful, sophisticated individuals are turned into a caricature of a whiney adolescent by something that one of their parents says, or even simply by their  presence. This sort of situation is so common that audiences can immediately relate to it. However, in order to become a fully functioning adult, this situation must be overcome and  this is what both Williamson and Nerin address. You Cant Grow Up Till You Go Back Home When a friend of Nerins asked him what the book he